Did you know there are 7 types of grief? Isn't everybody’s grief the same? Yes, grief is all the deeply personal internal experience of your thoughts and feeling and this sounds straightforward. Yet, our grief and how we cope with the loss is greatly impacted by factors surrounding the loss. 

1.    Anticipatory Grief – As the name implies, this grief occurs before the final death or loss. When caregivers are tending to the needs of their loved one’s declining health, exhaustion may compound their grief expressions of sadness, anxiety, forgetfulness, and depression. Anticipatory is not just about the future death, but the losses occurring as the illness progresses.

2.    Ambiguous Grief – There are two ways ambiguous grief may be present. The first way is when the person may be present physically but not emotionally or mentally. An example is when a family member is suffering in addiction. The second way ambiguous grief occurs if the opposite situation. In this case, there is an absent person still alive as in the case of soldieries at war, missing runaways, or incarcerated family members. In both cases, there is hope for a better future while living in a painful present.

3.    Cumulative Grief – When many losses occur within a short period and there has not been the necessary time to process and adjust to the end of relationship. In this way a person may have a stack of grief to address. Car accidents that take the lives of family members may be such an example.

4.    Absent or delayed Grief: Our stages and ages has an impact in our ability to grieve. Or social circumstances may also negate or delay grief such as when wars or natural disasters impede the ability to a stable routine. Refugees fleeing their homeland may experience delayed grief. The quality of the relationship that has ended also impacts the qualities of grief.

5.    Prolonged Grief – When a person is preoccupied with loss, does not accept the loss, and their daily life has become clinically impaired for 6-12 months then a diagnosis of prolonged grief, or complicated grief, traumatic grief, or persistent complex bereavement disorder may be identified.

6.    Disenfranchised Grief – Stigma surrounding the death may stifle permission to fully admit or experience your thoughts and feelings. Death by suicide or overdose are examples of loss that may restrict reaching out to gain the support of family and friends.

Please note this is a cursory overview because whole books have been written on the type of grief.

Yours in living and loss,

Brenda