Grief has seasons that takes me to new people and places. It also takes me inward to expand and hold all of life's experiences. As this capacity expands, the presence of grief is given permission to be part of my inner landscape. I call this my grief scape. I am embracing my new identity and single life.

My heart has expanded to hold both the sorrow and the joys of life. My year now has chunks of time ( 6-7 weeks) that lead up to his death anniversary and again leading up the Christmas holiday. My energy is down. I feel the melancholy and loneliness throughout the day. It is good to have purpose and work in the day. I am thankful to be invited out for lunch or coffee. But I’m not very hungry. I don’t push myself to do more than is comfortable. I smile. I enjoy some laughter. I tell my community of family and friends about this season I am passing through. I light a candle each day to honour his presence.

Yes, I continue living through my loss.

Brenda