Losing a pet is a valid form of loss and grief. It is often explained that a pet becomes a member of the family so no wonder its absence is felt deeply. Our life and home are not the same without our pet’s presence. Often, we have lived with our pet for years and our routine has been shaped by its presence. Pets are a constant and loving companion to families and singles. Loving and loss go hand in hand. This declaration is a list of statements to guide you in your grief.

Pet owners have the right to:

 a.   acknowledge this grief as valid and real, 

b.   avoid guilt or shame about your loss,

c.    grieve in your own particular way within your own timeline,

d.   grief is not a disease and you do not need to be cured,

e.   talk about your pet and your grief, 

f.     feel a range of emotions such as shock, confusion, sorrow, disorientation, fear, guilt, and relief,

g.   experience ‘grief attacks’ that come out of nowhere and overwhelm you in your daily routine,

h.   treasure your memories,

i.     make use of rituals and create memorial site,

j.     search for meaning,

k.    move towards your grief and heal. 

 Find others who will listen and validate your sorrow and your memories. When you suppress your grief, it complicates and prolongs your healing. Be patient and tolerant with yourself. With time and the honest expression of your loss, your capacity to hold the memory will increase and strong emotions will gradually subside. 

Yours in living and loss, Brenda

 Reference: Living Through Loss Society of BC, 2018.